This week’s hot conversational topic in the Nut and Squirrel was the Global Economic Crisis, with particular reference to a little-reported side-effect that has huge ramifications. I am, of course, referring to the devaluation of Brownie Points.
Unless you’re English, I guess some explanation may be called for at this point. So, at the risk of getting all anthropological…
Brownie Points are awarded by females to their mate for certain actions. When enough brownie points have been accrued, the male of the species can have these converted into a Pass.
The Pass can be used for a night out with the lads, at the footie, or whatever other pursuit is of interest.
This system is instinctively understood by females, although, due to the sudden and unexpected fluctuations in value, less so by the males.
You will often hear conversations such as :
“We’re going to Luton Saturday, their playing Mansfield, you reckon you can get a pass ?”
“Sorry, we’re at the Garden Centre on Saturday, need to earn some brownie points.”
This system goes under many different guises but is essentially the same the world over.
Lately however, it has become apparent that males are having to work harder for their brownie points than previously. The suspicion is that this is related to the retail price of women’s shoes.
What a mess. Where can you put your hard earned savings to ensure an index-linked return ?
Well, if you really want to know, you’ll have to read the Financial Times. Variables in PL/SQL, however, can be indexed-linked to database columns by the simple expedient of an anchored declaration. (more…)
Oracle SQL and PL/SQL Coding Standards – Cat Herding for Dummies
October 22, 2011Whilst in Montreal recently, Deb and I made a pilgrimage to the Circuit Giles Villeneuve, home of the Canadian Grand Prix. When not in use, the track is open to the public. It’s divided into two lanes – one for people to walk and cycle down down, and a one for people to drive down.
You can just imagine flying round in an F1 car. You come out of the excruciatingly slow L’epingle hairpin and build up to top speed as you tear down the Casino Straight. Ahead lies the final chicane before the start/finish line. A tricky right left combination with the treacherous curb on the inside of the last turn ready to spit the unwary into the Wall of Champions on the opposite side of the track.
At over 300 kph you start to think about spotting your braking point. Suddenly, this comes into view….
What do you think this is, a race track ?
… and now you know what it’s like to be a programmer, who has channeled raw inspiration through his or her dancing fingers to produce a thing of beauty and elegance…only to run into the QA person pointing out that the commas are in the wrong place according to page 823, paragraph 2 sub-section e of The Coding Standards.
Often measured in weight rather than the number of pages, Coding Standards documents are often outdated, arbitrary and just plain wrong.
On the other hand, their absence can cause much heartache, not least to those poor souls in support who are trying to maintain code where the Agilista philosophy of Code over Documentation has been taken to the ultimate extreme.
What follows is an attempt to make sense of the Coding Standards conundrum.
I’ll look at what I think a Coding Standards document should contain, and what it shouldn’t.
Then I’ll give some suggestions as to standards for Oracle SQL and PL/SQL which you can either embrace or throw rocks at, depending on your preference.
Before all of that however, I feel the need for some serious catharsis… (more…)
Tags:COMMENT ON COLUMN, CREATE OR REPLACE TRIGGER, DBMS_OUTPUT.PUT_LINE, implicit cursor, PL/SQL Coding Standards, TOO_MANY_ROWS
Posted in Oracle, OraDBPedia Syndication, PL/SQL, SQL | 1 Comment »