I got a new ( and possibly new-fangled) phone recently.
Having spent a suitably geeky amount of time exploring the new features of this slab of Android lovliness I did come across something which left me quite stumped… somebody rang me up on it.
Increasingly frantic tapping of the little green phone icon failed to result in me answering the call.
It was at this point that Deb took pity and explained in that ever-so-patient way people use to the hard of thinking, that I simply needed to swipe.
Needless to say, she’s not ever mentioned the incident again and would never dream of taking any opportunity to bring it up to elicit a laugh at my expense. Ahem.
It’s unfortunate that I also got a work phone recently and spent five minutes tapping the screen before I worked out that the Blackberry I was holding was not, in fact, a touch-screen device.
As the fast-paced world of consumer electronics passes by in an ever-increasing blur, I’m comforted by the fact that I can still learn something new.
For example, I was recently faced with a situation requiring me to load data from one table into two further tables, depending on certain criteria.
With the aid of my trusty netbook ( a form-factor that is apparently as outdated as it’s owner), I shall now demonstrate the wonder of the age that is the multi-table insert statement. Continue reading →
Guilty pleasures. For some, it’s a “diet” burger with “diet” fries, washed down with a “diet” shake. Others have a penchant for Kurt Geiger shoes. “I’m Welsh and I’m worth it”, they may well say. It may even be that Def Leppard track nestled in your playlist between Coldplay and Oasis.
In programming terms, APEX seems to fall into this category for me. On the one hand, it’s a declarative development environment. This means that, unless you’re very careful, the application you write for it is not going to be too portable to other front-end technologies. But, oh, it’s so nice to be able to bang out a bit of SQL and/or PL/SQL, click my mouse in the right place, and have a nice GUI application drop onto my browser.
If you’ve decided to try the latest and greatest APEX version on your XE installation, you’ll notice that the default Database Welcome Page disappears after the upgrade.
Rather than hunting around for it, I’ve decided to knock up something a bit better…well, different.
So, if you’d like to know how to get some interesting configuration information out of the database…or just want the entertainment value of watching me blunder about in APEX then read on… Continue reading →
Being Luis Suarez’s agent must be an interesting job right now.
Maybe the man was a bit peckish.
Alternatively, maybe he’s resigned to the FA’s reluctance to introduce a mid-season break and was simply making his own arrangements for time off during the season.
Either way, this particular agent may well be trying to sign Luis up for an ad campaign for a popular brand of toothpaste.
Oracle DBA’s may sometimes have some sympathy with Suarez, although they’re more likely to end up chewing the desk in frustration, rather than their fellow DBA’s (unless the Christmas Party has really gotten out of hand).
Every so often, Oracle throws out an error that, on the face of it, makes absolutely no sense… Continue reading →
Roberto Goldbrick. The name of the central character in a biting satire about a Premiership footballer ? Actually, it’s the name of the horse I drew out in the Office Grand National Sweep Stake.
“Oh well”, said Deb as the winner crossed the line with Roberto nowhere to be seen, “by next week it’ll be a value frozen lasagne”.
That’s the thing about vegetarians, they do like to assert their moral superiority at times. It can be quite difficult to find a suitable riposte. After all, you feel a bit of a twit accusing someone of vegicide.
In order to overcome my disappointment, I’ve taken refuge in Mint 14 XFCE running on my netbook.
Using the steps here and here I’ve managed to install Oracle 11gXE without any problems….apart from the fact that the Menu items now appear on the Others menu.
Being a lightweight desktop, XFCE doesn’t provide a default GUI to enable menu editing, so I’ve had to do a bit of investigation… Continue reading →
I had a rare technical issue with my blog recently. My e-mailed cry for help was answered and my problem resolved. The helpful soul at WordPress who aided me in my time of need was Jackie, who rejoices in the title of Hapiness Engineer.
I’d imagine that WordPress must have a novel and somewhat refreshing approach to Job titles.
We could apply this to Deb, for example. As a Health Professional working with the under fives, she could be a Small Human Maintenance Consultant.
There are some similarities between Deb’s job and my own. Whilst I have on occasion dealt with people whose job titles include words like ‘Chief’ and ‘Officer’, I also occasionally have to deal with the aftermath of toys being violently ejected from prams.
At the moment however, I find myself leading a team, all of whom are rather younger than me. This presents a number of challenges.
The realisation that I have children that are older than some of my colleagues is particularly acute when we discuss technological issues.
In computing terms, I grew up before the Internet was the all-pervasive presence it is now.
I learned to touch-type many years ago, in order to reduce the number of typos I made whilst writing code.
This is beginning to feel somewhat quaint with the proliferation of declarative development environments and technologies.
I suppose the point of this post is to wander back through the technologies that influenced my career as a programmer and explain why they are so important in shaping the technological landscape we now operate in. Continue reading →
My Dad gave me a book recently – the 100 Greatest Cricketers. As well as selecting what – in his opinion at least – were the 100 finest exponents of the game, the author also decided to rank them in order from 1 to 100.
At this point, for those who don’t know, I should perhaps explain that Cricket is one of those games given by the English to the rest of the world….to prove what sporting losers the English could be.
For any Australians reading, to whom this statement may ring hollow given their teams current travails, fret not. Historically, England’s brief ascendancy the battle for the Ashes tends to come to a juddering halt when least expected, usually in the form of a 4-0 thrashing ( think 1958-59, 1989).
Anyway, back to the book. Comparing players across different eras is hard enough – just how would you evaluate the relative merits of Sachin Tendulkar and Sir Jack Hobbs, for example ?
But comparing the relative merits of a batsmen and bowler who were contemporaries in the same team is equally problematic. Who is the greater cricketer out of Dennis Lillee and Greg Chappell, or Malcolm Marshall and Viv Richards ?
All of this brings to mind the saying, “how long is a piece of string”.
In SQL, at least, we do have an answer to this question…or do we ? Continue reading →
At last, we have reached the final episode of the Star Wars themed odyssey through the tangled web that is Oracle’s Diagnostic and Tuning Pack licensing.
Just as well really, Deb has flatly refused to give over any more evenings to my “research” – i.e. re-watching all of the films. Even the appeal of Ewan MacGregor’s Alec Guiness impression has now waned.
Just to recap then, so far I’ve looked at :
Now, finally we’re going to have a look at how we can minimize the chances of an errant select statement causing a whole heap of trouble.
Yes, we’re going to have a go at disabling access to the Diagnostic and Tuning Pack APIs without (hopefully), breaking anything. Continue reading →